Diet as a Form of Control
8-16-11
Everything seems to be spiraling out of my control. My health is questionable and doesn’t seem to be getting any better. It’s one of the reasons I decided to go back on this fucking diet, even though the reason I went off of it in the first place was spiraling health.
When I had gone off the diet, I had figured that it would be for a week or two, and then I would be back on. Well, I went off of it, and I ended up gaining thirty pounds in thirty days because of bed rest and stuff like that. All that hard work went down the bloody toilet.
Since everything has gone to hell in a hand basket, I made the decision to take back some control in my life. I cannot control my health at the moment. I can control what the fuck I put in my maw, though. Thus, the re-birth of this diet.
Thanks to a new friend, this diet has gotten more strict. Not only am I watching carbs, but I am finally counting calories; this time with fewer complexes! So far, I have been successful keeping my intake below 2000 calories (except for the first day).
As time moves on, it will get better… probably.
My thyroid is fucked right now. I lost 10 pounds from January to February of this year (you know...always try to start off to a good year...every year) and then after that I gained all of that back plus 7 more pounds and it just keeps going up another pound every couple of weeks. I have high cholesterol too so I've tried adjusting my meds on my own and taking more vitamins and nothing is working. I try not to eat as much and eat healthier when I do and work out more often but nothing is helping and it is so fucking frustrating!
ReplyDeleteI wish you luck in shrinking yourself, lol, and hopefully I can do the same.